All On My Own

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When we were still prepping to move, someone said, “Oh, you can always come back.” And I said, no. And they said, “But don’t you have any friends here? How could you just leave your friends?” Oh, I have the very best of friends. My tribe is so special, you guys.

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Which brings us to today. The first day I’m really feeling the sting of flying solo. Normally, today, I’d be texting Tara planning our outing. We’d have until 1 to play, because Wilson has school at 1:30. Tuesdays was usually Biz, because that’s when our schedules lined up. Katie would be lunch dates, because preschool every morning. Stefany had Friday’s free.

Today I’m on my own. We’re going to our new Children’s Museum alone, with just us. Ryan’s back to work. It’s just me and the kids, living this new life that we dreamed up. And I’m really sad about it. I know new friends will come, but they won’t be my old my friends. And I really love my old friends.

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It’s okay to want something huge and scary and be so excited and still be sad. Today, I’m feeling the loss. Tomorrow, we’ll climb mountains, but today is hard.

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